Look to the Future

September 18, 2007

For most of my life I’ve looked ahead rarely paying attention to now. Now just wasn’t enough. There had to be more. It had to get better.

I was always dreaming of a better car, a bigger house, the next meal, fall in summer or spring in winter; nothing was good enough. I had dreams of better things, better times, more money and I’ve accomplished most of them and the reality has almost never measured up to the dream. Because if there’s never enough, there’s never enough and now cannot matter and if it doesn’t matter what choice do I have but to look to the future.

What a waste! A waste of now is a waste of life and I’ve certainly wasted a lot of mine. I’m much better these days at being present and, as a result, I’m much happier.

I suppose it has something to do with the fact that I’m older now and there surely is more behind me than there is in front. There isn’t as much future to form in my mind’s eye. There aren’t quite as many people to impress although some remain. There are fewer mountains to climb and not as many battles to be fought. It’s a more peaceful time for me. I’m less likely to waste potential energy worrying about the future which once looked vast and filled with possibilities but has shrunk some and now looks a bit scary. Thoughts pop into my always busy brain suggesting that I do this or that and, as much as I hate to admit this, I often think it’s too late. I need to stay aware of this kind of thinking and understand that it’s never too late. Surely there are constraints but there have always been and all too often I’ve focused on them rather than on the abilities and the possibilities.

I am freer now than I’ve ever been. I have more tools at my disposal than ever before. There’s a lot I can do now in this so called autumn of my life and I’m going to do it. I have a lot to offer and I’m not going to let it go to waste. That saying about today being the first day of the rest of one’s life begins to make sense. Now becomes the starting line for the life I’ve been training for.

Posted September 18, 2007

1 Comment

when the mind is well trained by time to think in a certain way adopting something else is very diffcult but yes you have to keep reminding yourself the truth that there is a lot more out there than the things that make u comfortable thank u for this lovely piece seems like ur finally able to breathe in the world

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